The BAFT’s response has been quickly forthcoming
(This is a matter of emergency)
And following a crisis meeting held early this morning
The following announcement has been released to Sky TV.

"While it's true that certain plotlines have shown a 'novel' ending
Throwing doubt upon the proper handling of the typical fictional brat
We maintain we know what makes our own brats happy
And that, young men, is THAT.

Therefore unless these resolutions are instantly withdrawn
Only one course of action remains.
We will, regretfully, but determinedly,
Issue to all our members, canes."